Marie - my newest sexy new friend!

So it's a lazy Sunday afternoon and the door bell rings. It's really loud. I have enough trouble squeezing in my 18 hours of sleep everyday without being bothered by the doorbell. I wasn't expecting anybody so I had to investigate. By investigate I mean I lifted my head a little off of the pillow on the sofa and halfway opened one eye and saw the zipper of her jeans! I point this out because usually when I lift my head I'm expecting to see someone else's head. You know, like on top of their body. This girl is TALL! And she's got legs that don't end. uh oh ... that sounds a little predatory I guess. If I'm to believe the language in the last court injunction against me. Stupid dogs. But by traditional human measures, she's like around 6 feet tall! She's not like the shorties that usually wander around this dump.

So I don't know who the hell she is but right away she's like Oh what a cutie! and That's a great looking cat! and Does he mind if I pick him up?Where's she get off asking someone else if it's ok to pick me up?? In her defense she does seem to recognize that I'm special and unusually attractive. She doesn't seem like the type to dish out some Fancy Feast though.

It's rather obvious that if someone wants to pick me up - they should ask me. Since it's all about me! My owner goes like I don't care and it's getting all really annoying! Then this girl (people call her Marie) chases me down and gives me a big squeeze! (see surveillance photo) At first I thought what the heck?? But then she pulls me really close in and wants to bond with me.

I've got nothing against pretty girls wanting to bond with me! And I'm not going to start having problems with it now because she didn't know how to ask properly. I know not to look a gift horse in the mouth! Actually, I'm not even sure what that means, but it seems to fit somehow. I don't even like horses - they're too big, they smell alot and they don't poo in a litter box. Anyway, it turns out that she's pretty cool. She gets her picture taken alot which reminds me that the guy with the big camera hasn't taken my picture for several days. I think it's several days. It was at least 4 cans of Fancy Feast Ocean Buffet with Gravy ago. I don't worry about keeping time. Mostly because as long as I get fed I could care less. When you sleep 18 hours a day it's easy to lose track! HA!

She was fun but my owner (not the pretty one) kept chasing me off the set when I would try and see if she'd want to squeeze me some more. I'd welcome her back but I have no idea how to get ahold of her. I keep trying to let my litter changers know that I need a cat secretary to keep track of these kinds of things. An official cat secretary, not a temp or something! I could use a little more traffic like Marie around here. This place is about as exciting as being stuck in a drain pipe during the rain. One thing about her, she livens things up around this place! It's sure not lively right now. I'm going to take a nap so leave me alone.