Sexy New Friend - Tarra

Tarra's one of my favorites. She's not really a new friend. She's been here before. One things for sure - she knows how to treat a cat. She's a very experienced girl. I mean she's experienced with me. That's all I meant by that. She's so warm and smells nice - she's the complete package!

She usually stays a couple days when she visits cuz she comes in from Vegas. That's always good for me. She knows where the Fancy Feast Tuna Feast with Gravy is in the morning so we always get along.

Life is good.

My two really cool new friends!

Today was pretty fun with a bunch of people coming over. Most of them seemed to want to lavish attention on me - which I'm used to. These two cuties wanted to show me some love (Billy on the left and Diana). You know what was kinda funny about them is that I'm actually older than either of them. I'm talking human years. I'm told I'm 15 human years old. I don't keep track of these things because as long as I have my savory Grilled Fancy Feast Seafood dinner in the morning, I pretty much don't pay attention to the details. I do notice some details and what I noticed about these two was that they were very cool - as can be seen in this surveillance photo. This suited me just fine as I prefer to get held by really cool people and there's clearly not enough of those kind hanging around here. I gotta go as I have several more blog things to write up. My owners never followed through with getting me a personal assistant. Maybe Diana or Billy would want that job ...

My new Katt friend!

Just so there's no confusion - her name is Katt. You know how they say What's in a name? Actually, I'm not even sure what that means. My point is that she's not really a cat. She's more like a human since she's not furry like me and doesn't have a tail. She's the only human I know whose name is also my species. She seems to be a friend of my one owner (not the big one) as they get together and watch movies quite a bit and the big guy seems to want to avoid them. She is interested in my getting fed. And she lets me in. She seems to be quite attracted to me. She either likes being a mom or she has some kind of unnatural affection for me. I'm used to humans adoring me. Maybe she could be president of my fan club! I appreciate her letting me back in the house when I get bored with what's outdoors. That way I can look forward to being bored with what's indoors. HA!!

My Cancer Check-up with Dr Schoen

Theme of the Day: Bloodtests!

Well, yippie. Here we are again! Dr Schoen's medical clinic. Just sitting around waiting for medical attention. Now that's the thing - I don't need any medical attention. I've done my best to not barf on the bed and to keep the upchucking of fur balls outdoors. It's like I'm being punished or something!

Dr Schoen apparently has some kind of affirmative action program at the clinic where she is forced against her will by federal law to treat some quota of dogs. Otherwise, I'm sure she wouldn't have dogs here. It's just too nice of a place.

I'm feeling fine and don't mind sitting here with my pretty owner even though the ride over in the PPU (personal prison unit) always gets me grumpy! They treat me like a criminal sometimes.

I glare at my other owner and he gets up so I snatch the opportunity for a more comfortable chair that I deserve that will remove me from a tile floor that the people here allow DOGS to run on.

I think dogs have peed in here. It doesn't smell, but it just has that weird creepy feeling that you get when dogs have been around indiscriminately urinating on things. I don't know why dog owners even bring them in to a vet. This world would be a better place with fewer dogs. Less barking, less poop surprises in the front yard. I was sitting on the fence in the front the other day and this big fat guy walks by with a dog on a leash (it's disgusting that dogs allow this leashing business). So anyways, this dog just squats in my front yard and takes a dump!

I can't tell you how ill this made me feel. If that dog had been there alone I would have chased him down and scratched his face off but in this case I was afraid the big fat guy, Mr Giganto, would topple over on me. They would have never found me!

I've strayed a little off topic - everyone but the most stupid humans know that dogs are the retards of the animal kingdom.

The other owner took this picture. To the extent that you can call it a picture - the composition is horrible! It's not like I expect Ansel Adams to return from the grave, but I just wish he would try a little harder. He always talkes about his fancy camera. I bet that thing is smarter than he is! Which would explain alot, I guess.

It turns out I'm here for a check up. Jennifer, who is a vet tech here and she's the one who looks after me at home when my owners desert me, spills the beans that I need some blood work done so my oncology vet (Dr Prouix <--- board certified) can send in a prescription for my cancer pills. This requires several vets and a medical laboratory to coordinate my treatment since these are human cancer drugs. My cancer is in remission but that doesn't make me any more thrilled to be called the cancer cat by my owners. But it's nice to know that everyone around here understands that I'm an important celebrity and requires a complete medical team for my well-being. That just comes with being so important.

So I'm here for a check up. I'm feeling fine (except for the ride in the PPU (personal prison unit) which always gets me in a bad mood! Dr Schoen comes in and starts doing her medical stuff - poking me in places that are not always pleasent. She must realize that I'm feeling fine since she seems so happy.

The good mood disappears in a hurry though when she grabs a torture instrument (see forensic photo below) and reaches around to my back side! At that point I demand that no more photos be taken. In the internet era, photos have a way of ending up on the internets. That's like celebrity cat 101. At any rate, just remembering this is putting me out of the mood to blog.

I do feel important though. This vet visit isn't cheap and that blood workup - well let's just say I'm glad that didn't come out of my Fancy Feast fund. And the pills - get this - 120 bucks for two months supply.

I'm feeling luved!

The Vet again!

My owner (the cute one) took me to the vet yesterday! I wasn't sick or anything! It turns out it was a routine physical. Humans need to know that there isn't any "routine" about me! It wasn't to bad since it was Dr Schoen who has been my primary vet from like the beginning. Her and I go back a long way. I've gained some more weight which they say is a good thing. I'm ok, she said. I could of told them that! I can't believe my owners pay big money to people to tell them I'm ok. Their lack of confidence in my ok-ness is beginning to annoy me. It might eat away at the cat confidence of many felines, but since I know that I'm wonderful and plenty more than just "ok" it's not an issue for me. I feel just fine! Except for being shoved into a cat carrier and having a thermometer stuck up my back end. I mean, other than that, I feel fine!

There were some photos taken of the event, but I don't know where they are right now. My owners could be a little more on the ball about my publicity needs! My fans have a need to know. Now that I look my blog over, I'm noticing all kinds of events that aren't on here yet. I got one or two Sexy New Friend entries that aren't here. I got my picture taken with another visitor or something.

I need to complain louder. Maybe after my nap.

Ashley - My sexy new friend!

Ashley came over today. She's been over before and I really like her visits. She always seems to think I need some attention. While I don't need it - attention from her is always might fine. Ashley rocks! 

Us Maine Coons are not like ordinary, run of the mill, low rent cats. Maine Coons, because of their fine breeding, enjoy being petted while we're eating. I don't think any other cat rolls that way.


Here's she's pointing at me. I wasn't paying her much attention because I was eating my Friskies hard food. Someone must have come in wondering where that famous Huskercat was and she's just being helpful and pointing me out. I don't mind my fans visiting as long as they don't bother me too much. My days tend to be pretty busy being a predator and having to sleep a lot.

This is a really adorable picture of her. But that's besides the point. I'm not in that photo. There really isn't a need for any photos on my blog that do not have me in them. This is just common sense. You wouldn't expect to see any photos of me on Lassie's web site! Although Lassie's site would experience a major upgrade in quality if I was on there. I wouldn't be on Lassie's site anyway.  She's totally whored out to the Natural Way Natural Dog Food company. Dogs are stupid - you don't need two Naturals in your company name. And what's up with Natural Way? It sounds gay! Kinda Natural Way Gay! 

Natural Way Dog Food - sounds like it's for constipated dogs! Yeah! That's it! Dogs are full of shit!!! This just proves something I've said for a long time - you get a dog involved and everything will go retarded. There - I said it, now I"m outta here!

The Engineers Guide to Cats

Two engineers have conspired to put together some kind of how to handle your cat video. While much of the information in the video is true and factual (obviously we need to sleep a lot), the forced yodeling is beyond the pale. These cats did not want to yodel. That's because cats do not yodel. Dogs yodel and that's because they're stupid. Only stupid animals yodel on their own free will.

So this is the video I am talking about. I have to give it a thumbs down (as we critics say) because of this humiliating forced yodeling. I assume these two engineers make lots of money. Because they'll need it after I drag them into court and they have to pony up punitive damages!

I'm disgusted!!