Friday, August 31, 2012

Liam, the Huskercat, makes special appearance at the Pink Leopard

Well today was a little different!  On the way back from seeing the Vet for my annual shots to protect me against diseases, my owner stopped off at a local eatery called the Pink Leopard. He had to take me in because it's against the law here in California to leave an animal or a child in a hot car.  California has laws for everything! It's nice to know I have legal rights!

A little to my surprise, I was very popular in this establishment. You'ld think people had never seen a puss before! This place was very fancy. Here I am with the head Leopard Girl. All the girls who worked there wore these really fashionable leopard paw-print dresses. Technically I'm not sure if it's a dress or not. It's not any bigger than a shirt. They said I was a chick magnet. I had the impression that was a good thing. I got my picture taken with lots of the girls.
Photo by noted celebrity photographer, Dave Proctor
After all the girls were getting their picture taken with me, this big fellow visited us and said we had to leave since cats weren't allowed in the establishment. He seemed really rude and should take a seminar on how to treat customers if you ask me! My owner said that can't be right - a place named after a cat legally has to allow cats inside. This seemed to confuse him for a second, but then he laughed and asked if I was 21. At that point the conversation got kind of weird. This guy didn't seem to like me and the discussion got a little hard to follow, but my fans should know what happened.  I'll just reproduce the discussion between my owner and Mr. Bouncer (talk about a goofball name!). 

Mr Bouncer:  Is that cat of yours 21? You have to be 21 to come in here.

My Owner: He's older than 21.

Mr Bouncer:  That's bullshit. What year was it born?  (Liam comment: referring to a cat as "it" is just racist!)

My Owner: Liam was born in 2008 ... in August. 

Mr Bouncer:  You're not very good at math are you? That makes the cat 4 years old, not 21. And what kind of name is "Liam"?  That's just gay.  (Liam comment: wow - this guy is racist AND a bigot!)

My Owner: Sorry, dude, but he's a cat so 4 years and 1 month, using the algebraic cat age conversion formula his age translates into 33 years old. 

Mr Bouncer:  I can't believe I'm having this stupid conversation!! Listen, your fur ball has to show a photo ID with his age or I'm tossing both of you out of here. 

My Owner: You're kidding, right??  Show an ID for a cat!!

Mr Bouncer:  Right. Show it and you guys stay. No photo ID for the cat and you're both out. It's as simple as that Mr Smart-ass!

(so now something really funny happened! My owner pulls out my HomeAgain photo ID which has my picture on it and my age! I also have a microchip in me which is why I'm often referred to as a high-tech cat.)

My owner proferred my ID - all the girls started laughing like crazy! I'll cease the paraphrasing re-creation now. Mr Bouncer got really steamed and the head Leopard Girl came over and told him we could stay as long as my owner kept ordering pitchers. The food never showed up which is odd for a restaurant. But like I said this is a very fancy place and even had some very acrobatic dancers on-stage! Very classy place! I heartily recommend it.  Just ask for the head Leopard Girl and tell her that Liam sent you.